It sure as hell is. Oh, I should probably tell you now: I have the vocabulary of a well-educated sailor. So if you're offended...well, if you're offended, there's a big wide internet out there...choose your own adventure. Words only have the meaning and power we give them. Plus, studies have shown cursing is good for you...so there.
Now where was I?
Right. Life's too short not to sparkle. It's also too short not to live authentically.
This phrase gets thrown around a lot in personal development and, as happens with overuse, it's lost power and meaning. (Ah, we're back to words and meaning again.)
What does it mean to be truly AUTHENTIC?
Well that's easy, you say, it means to be yourself.
"Just Be Yourself."
Let me stop you right there. Being authentic and being yourself doesn't give you license to be:
an asshole, a hot mess, an emotional blackmailer, or one of those unspeakable demons who will open a can of tuna on an airplane (WHY).
"Be Yourself" means you have done the exploration and the inner work to understand who you are and why you've done what you've done in your life...
...the good stuff and thatstuffwearentsoproudofandletsjustnottalkaboutitmmkay...
...so you can learn from it and truly know your own heart. When you know your heart, you can love yourself. When you love yourself, you have boundaries. When you love yourself, you can truly love someone else...and not just one someone. All the someones. You can see that even though you may disagree wholeheartedly with another human...they are still a human being with a soul.
The journey to authenticity is about unraveling the stories you've been telling yourself, often for years. It takes intention. It takes introspection. It takes curiosity, compassion, and courage. It's about getting uncomfortable and being open to growth: because the only way out is through.
My purpose in this life is to guide others to know what it means to love themselves. I maintain that the suffering in this world (that which is caused by mankind) stems from a lack of self love, or worse, the presence of self-loathing. That pain and disconnection are why we so often, as Thoreau said, “live lives of quiet desperation”.
Except sometimes it’s not so quiet.
Pain, when suppressed, manifests as difficulty, anger, conflict, stress, relationship problems, addiction, financial debt, weight struggles…on and on. The work is to see it, heal it, learn to truly love yourself...and move your life forward, once and for all. By creating this shift, one person at a time, we create a ripple effect that CAN change the world.
Why is this my soul’s calling? Because I know what it's like NOT to love yourself. I often tell my clients one of the reasons I feel so called to coaching is because I've made ALL the mistakes. I've learned ALL the lessons, the hard way. So when say, "I get it, I've been there"....I mean I've felt it. I've lived it. I've cried through it. I've been at rock bottom. I've learned. I've healed. And I'm here to help guide others along the path.
I’m well-acquainted with my Gremlin voice…the voice that tells me I don’t fit in, I’m not enough, not worthy of love. You have one too. We all do. It’s just a matter of how loud it is. The key is to identify it and slap that pointy-eared shit-talking bastard out of the driver's seat of our lives and back into the trunk where he belongs.
NOTE: I've wanted to write this blog for many years.
Eventually, I'll turn it into a book because:
We need to talk about self-love in a real way.
We need to read about it.
We need to learn about it.
We need to feel it, embrace it, and do the work...to love ourselves.
Visit my publication on Elephant Journal: